Anxiety

I don't know what's next for me or the country

Everything changed Wednesday, January 7, 2026.

I woke up to news stories about David Pepper joining Dr. Amy Acton as her running mate in her bid to become Ohio’s next governor. David, as many of you know, runs the Substack Pepperspectives, which has published my editorial cartoons for the past two years. David had sent me a message a few weeks earlier, saying he needed to pause on the cartoons while making a political decision. I had a hunch that he’d be joining Dr. Acton. I’m grateful beyond words that David published my cartoons for the past two years, and I hope he and Dr. Acton will be able to make a change for Ohioans. That said, I’m still human. I’ve lost a major source of my income. I don’t know what’s next for me, a middle-aged cartoonist in a dying field with no college degree and no skills beyond cartooning. That in itself is enough to cause me to be anxious.

But then I saw the news about the state-sanctioned murder of Renee Good in Minneapolis. And I read the comments from Donald Trump and Kristi Noem and JD Vance, who’ve labeled Good a “domestic terrorist.” And the realization hit that we now live in a police state where the state can call anyone opposed to the regime a domestic terrorist and can execute that person on the spot.

I began hyperventilating. I’ve not stopped hyperventilating.

I’m terrified.

There’s a weight on my chest that hasn’t let up. The ground doesn’t feel solid anymore. As someone with ADHD, I can’t turn off my brain. The worry, the anxiety, the sadness, the anger, it’s there all day, everyday. I distract myself by watching comfort TV and sneaking naps. I exercise, I visit with friends. But the weight is still there.

I don’t know what comes next for me. I don’t know what comes next for our country or our planet. Nothing feels safe.

Yeah, I realize this post is damn bleak. I hesitated writing this, and tried to convince myself that it’d be better to write a post about my other freelance work projects, or share photos of my new kitten, Calliope. That I should maintain the facade of being a “successful cartoonist,” as a friend recently put it. I’ve told myself that no one wants to know that I’m struggling because of the state of the world. I’m an editorial cartoonist. I should be made of tougher stuff.

But I’d rather be honest. I don’t want to put on a mask.

I know I’m not the only one struggling with employment issues. I know millions of others are trying to make sense of the chaos in our country and are as angry, and as sad, and as disoriented as I am.

I try to remember I’m not alone. I hope you’re able to remember that, too.

Stay safe out there.

Help me keep the lights on and the cartoons flowing. Consider becoming a paid subscriber to Kevin’s UnNecessary Things. Your support allows me to draw more cartoons and speak truth to power. You can also support me by leaving me a one-time tip on Ko-fi, or by clicking here to visit my Etsy store, where you can purchase signed prints of my cartoons.